Teej's Secret Box

Note:  This was written on December 23rd, but not posted until now due to myself being so busy with the family.

My, what an interesting year it has been for myself, this Year of the Recession Part LXVIII (basically, we have gone through this before, and life will get better if you work at your skills (improving and/or expanding), and continue to ensure that everyone is aware of your skills and desire to help them).  We got a new president elected, and we’re witnessing the fall of our banks and auto makers.  Some of my friends have been laid off, as many companies quickly move to protect their positions in this economy.

I did not help my position by slacking off, especially in a critical deadline junction at one customer.  My scrambling to save the project fell woefully short, and my company had to bring in a guy who previously quit while working for the same client only to come back later on.  However, I hope that my efforts the past few months, especially the past 3 weeks, have been fruitful to help recover some of the damaged reputations.

I do need to finish one more certification test, and start studying on a different one.  Even though I am on vacation the next two weeks, this needs to be done, so I will have this done.

I have only taken one trip out of the country this year — to Aruba, which was a delight, especially in the culinary sense.  However, in exchange for the trips I usually take, I ended up finding the love of my life.

A long time ago, a friend by the name of Amy Lynn Edwards (Peterson), who was strong with intuition, noted to me that I have already met the love of my life, just that I have not realized it at that time.  That memory stuck with me, even in my disbelief.  I chose to try out the dating websites, and became more social in the deaf world in Phoenix.  But both never really panned out.  Early in this year, I decided to just stop searching, and start experiencing life the way I want to live it.  I flirted mercilessly with a female friend of mine, with no luck (a common refrain everyone probably experienced.)

Then a grade school classmate found me on Facebook.  In fact, quite a few classmates found me on Facebook, but this one is from Salt Lake City, and is a successful deaf culinary chef at a five-star hotel there, a long way from his troubles back in school.  Amazed and highly impressed, I caught up on the news with him, and was reconnected to a few other classmates, including her.

Heather and I started talking, and we both realized that she was going to pay Salt Lake City a visit.  I thought that it was cool enough to experience a new city with two of my old friends, so we decided to set plans for me to swing by for a weekend.

But a funny thing happened during this planning phase — we ended up talking deep into the nights.  Once we met in person, I fell in love with her.  It wasn’t the type of lusting after that I experienced in the past, but a matter of, “yes, she is the one.”  I keep hearing my friends saying the same, and many pundits talking about this phenoma, but I couldn’t quite believe it until I actually experienced it.

We connected in so many ways, and her flaws were not an issue for me, just as mine is not for her.  Within three months due to several circumstances, she begun to live with me at my home.  In just a couple of days, her two kids will join us.

The past half of year have to be the best half year of my life.  The initial lust have evolved into such a deep undying love.  I felt a need to be with my love as much as I could, which lead me to weekends being spent with her, instead of elsewhere.  I am ready to sacrifice my life in order to better the lives of my family as much as is reasonably necessary.  I cares for our kids, and hope they will care for me in return.

It is amazing, this feeling I am blessed with.  I can only hope it’ll last for a very long time.

How was your year?  Please feel free to share.

With best wishes for a safe holiday for all of our friends and families –

Wii Fit – Age 32 – 34 minutes.

* * *

This past week, I had the great luck in meeting up with my old classmates.  Donnie was two years behind me, and Heather was 4 years below in grade school.  It turns out that Donnie lives in Salt Lake City, and Heather was heading there for the weekend to work at her company’s headquarters.  Since I have never been to Salt Lake City, what better time to pay the city a visit than this past weekend?

I am so glad I went, for many different reasons.  I learned so much more about the history behind the Church of the Jesus Christ of the Latter Day Saints.  I reformed wonderful friendships with Heather and Donnie.  I got to meet Shelly again, a classmate whom I have not seen since I was a kid as she was several years ahead.  I also got to appreciate two awesome restaurants, and explore a new city of my own.

* * *

I met up with Donnie, Heather, and Shelly for dinner at the Tuscany Italian restaurant out near the mountains.  Donnie was joined by his wife, TC, and their beautiful daughter who is just starting to take her first few steps at 9 months of age.  The restaurant was top-notched.  Granted, it was not a luxury experience on par with the five stars restaurants, but it held its own against the competition.  Service was excellent, and the conversation flowed like unimpeded water.  Catching up on the years, it was a great experience.

* * *

I also met up with Donnie the following day, and have him give me a tour of his church’s sacred grounds – the Temple Square. This location is home to the infamous Salt Lake Temple.  Lesser known for its location, but well known for its choir, Tabernacle is located next to the Temple.  Tucked to a corner, the Assembly Hall is a very lovely small church building built with the leftover stones from the Salt Lake Temple.

Donnie and I met up with several missionaries, including two Sisters (a female equivalent to the male’s Elders), some who knew ASL, and one knowing British Sign Language.  Whatever they may not know, they made it up with their eagerness to answer my history questions, including the purpose of having three sacred buildings on the same site.

It turns out that the Temple is meant for an individual or small group worship toward their God, not as a big temple auditorium like Basilica di San Pietro in Vaticano.  Instead, that role is assigned to the Tabernacle, and the Assembly Hall’s gatherings are conducted by volunteers rather than ministers.  All three buildings serve unique purposes for LDS faithful.

There were several enlightening moments like that, and so much worth the exposure to understand this religion.  The rest of Salt Lake City was nice, including the Trax, something I know a certain friend would drool over if she is in town.

* * *

Heather and I went to the Bohemian Brewery, a wonderful Deutsch pub.  It was so nice to eat traditional brats, although by Heather’s claims, it was not quite as traditional, as the appropriate mustard, Lowensenf, was not served.  Instead, the restaurant opted to use the close cousin’s version – Grey Poupon – due to its availability.  Considering how much I like Grey Poupon, I am quite curious about this particular mustard.

I had the unfiltered white ale called Bavarian wier.  Despite the label, it is not all that cloudy, which separate it from its peers.  It was extremely tasty, and I was only limited by the knowledge that I had to drive afterward.

Altogether, the brewery is an amazing find, and something I would strongly recommend to anyone who is seeking some traditional Deutsch fare.

* * *

It is so much worth it to catch with your friends, as some of them may alter your previous naive opinion about them.  To be able to gain new respect and a few wonderful friendships are so wonderful.  I thank them all from the bottom of my heart for meeting up with me.

Note, you can see the complete photo album here.

Wii Fit – 1:14 real time, :45 credited.  I got hurt playing Wii Fit.  There is this ligament toward the inside of my left elbow that is tender when I stretch my arm outward.  I think I hurt it doing the pushup part.

As for the comment asking whether Wii Fit is worth it — it definitely is.  Instead of relying on video tapes where they tell you what to do, and you try to do it in a haphazard way, this actually give you immediate feedback on your balance.  The lack of upper body exercises (I only spot pushups, plank, side planks and the stretch back as an actual arm exercises compared to a huge amount of abs, thighs, and lower leg exercises.)

There was actually someone who got in a much better shape after 7 weeks of Wii Fit, with noticeably trimmer abs (much smaller beer belly).  I can’t find that blog at the moment, so here’s the Wired version.

And here’s a good reason to get your wife/girlfriend Wii Fit…

* * *

Looks like the Phoenix Deaf Professional Happy Hour is at Sushi 101 in Tempe, AZ this Friday.  Woohoo!  It’s a decent place, but I can see a lot of deaf people deciding not to go due to the nature of the food being offered.  Ah well, all the more sushi for me.

* * *

I actually did some work today!  Boy that was tough for me to do!  No really, I actually made some major progress on this project, which is a relief in a sense.  Here’s hoping the customer will appreciate the data being loaded as we speak.

* * *

There are times when I really appreciate my water softener and filter.  As folks here in Phoenix know, the water is very hard, heavy with minerals that give it a thick texture, and a tangy taste.  I had to get some water from a vending machine at Costco yesterday because I drank all of the water I filled up before I left to shop.  After months of using bottled water or my filtered water, the taste was jarring.  To make sure I was not being poisoned, I tried the water from my tap to the house, and it was the same.

All homes in Phoenix should have a softener at the very least.

* * *

I just got in touch with two people from my youth, both are younger than me, and we ended up chatting with each other all night long.  That was so awesome to be able to get in touch with each other.  All of my preconceived notions of them have been forever destroyed.

Can you imagine a guy who everyone, EVERYONE, wrote off as a lost cause being a successful chef of a five-diamond hotel’s restaurant within 15 years?  That’s one of the friends I chatted with tonight.

It turns out that the other friend will be visiting the city this weekend, so that inspired me to use my air miles to fly up there, and visit them both.  Plus damn it, I need to see how good he is, after all I’m Anton Ego.

It is amazing that the week I actually start working on my life, things just get shaken loose, and started my life going again.

This wine, the friends, the finetune music, work going well so far, and more… amazing.

Now I need a girl.

LOL

Over the past year or so, I have found my productivity to be wanting.  Instead of doing the best for my customers, I found myself procrastinating on work, simply because I find it boring.  It has gotten to the point where my reputation is most likely shot, and I am now one of the legions of consultants that many have grown to hate.  It really does not feel good to be one of those people who just leech money away from your company doing very little to help contribute to it.  But this feeling still does not compel me to work.

This past Memorial Day weekend, I found myself at my family’s house and vineyard, where they are growing Merlot and Viognier grapes.  Laid on about 3 acres, populated with three dogs, and three horses, it is a nice rural home with all of the creature comforts.  A result of several years (I want to say three years, but my memory may be failing me here) of extremely hard labor, mostly by one guy – my brother in law – with help by his wife – my sister – they both built this small precious world out of acidic forested grounds.

They did it because they want to do it.  They both love their dogs, and they wanted horses to raise and ride on.  My brother-in-law went even further, desiring a young difficult female horse to train and ride on.  They initially planned on two horses, and lately been discussing about getting a fourth horse to be a mother, and raise a baby horse.

They will be harvesting their first batch of grapes this fall (hopefully, if everything cooperates from the weather to the wildlife), and send it off to a winery to have wines made.

I sat there outside, and thought about what they have done.  Tucker, one of their dogs – a corgi welsh, tried his best to keep me occupied by having me throw a Frisbee or a rubber ball for him to fetch with great glee.  While throwing, I still wonder – would I ever be able to do something like this?

Right now, the answer is no.  There is one key difference between myself and the two of them:  They want it.  They want to ride horses.  They want to farm.  They want to live in the great open sky.  They want to even go as far as buying more lands at great expenses just to preserve the privacy they are enjoying.  They want to appreciate a nice hot tub under the stars.  They want a lot of things, and they are actually doing all they can to achieve their dreams.  Since they desire this, they are far more willing to put in the great effort on doing the little annoying things to achieve their dreams.

They have to spray the grapes because there’s a great risk of the plants getting fungus.  They have to groom their horses.  They have to mow the grass.  They have to clean the horse poops 3 times a day.  They have to feed the animals.  They have to maintain a lot of their equipments.

I do not want a farm.  I do not desire a wide open land of grass to mow.  I do not want dogs.  I do not want horses.  I do not want to be confined to my home at the expense of not traveling.  I do not want to do any of those things.  It is not in my desire to live a life like that.

I really enjoy the place.  I love the dogs.  I find the horses fascinating.  But as the saying goes, I would rather be an uncle, than a father – all the fun stuff, without the nasty stuff.  I really appreciate the hard work my family done.  I really appreciate the efforts my peers and others have made to get things done.  I just do not want to do it.

Is that a character flaw for me?  The attitude I am holding here at work, not desiring to do the dirty work anymore, although I enjoy this stuff on a much more superficial level?  I do chat and hold great conversations with my peers.  But when they go back and code up something because they have to, I go back and seek other stuff to learn about.

It is not that I hate this job – I love to travel.  I love to meet new people.  I love to explore new things.  I am just not doing what I am supposed to do – work my butt off, and get this project done.  That’s why even though I feel a renewed resolve to finish this project, I know this will go away, and I will slack off once again.

What do I really want to do, and how can I make a living doing what I want?  What is there that I feel an urge to do to the point where I’m willing to do the dirty work to achieve that?  I had the drive to code, but now I don’t.

I got a lot more thinking to do.

A mention in the comments of this blog on the use of sign language brought up some fond memories of my youth.

I was mainstreamed in the Roanoke City Schools in Virginia.  This school system includes a designated elementary school, middle school (junior high when I was attending), and high school where there are teachers and interpreters for the deaf providing equal education for deaf kids in the region.  Starting at about fourth grade, I was shifted to hearing classrooms with the aid of interpreters/teacher aides for classes that I am strong enough to work in a hearing environment.  Those classes include science, history, and math, while I was undergoing intensive training in English and speech therapy.

In those classes, there were some hearing students who became so fascinated with our sign language that some of them went out and learned fingerspelling.  A program was set for a large group of 5th and 6th graders to sign the words for “We are the World” song that was the rave at that time.  Yes, every single one of them signed that song on the behest of the teachers coordinating this.

I met with a few of my old classmates at a reunion recently, and I can tell you without a doubt that only two people signed to me at the reunion.

Two.

I was not quite an unpopular boy by any means.  I was well known, and I still keep in touch with some of the old classmates.  I am sure some of them read this blog, so please understand — I am not blaming you, or accusing you of anything.  And again, I had a fantastic time catching up with all of the old classmates at the reunion, and look forward toward meeting them again in the near-future.  What I am just simply saying is that the motivation to learn sign language is actually very rare, despite the opportunities present in this environment.

Look at RIT as a perfect example of huge integration of deaf and hearing folks.  A very small percentage of hearing folks know sign beyond the basic words (hello, thank you, and so on forth), much less fingerspelling, that would lead to folks being able to learn new words by spelling them to us deaf folks (to a fault, we love to show them the signs we have for those words, if only to help them minimize the exhausting nature of spelling the words out.)

There were a lot of opportunities to learn in private — there were bookmarks and calendars provided with the alphabets in sign language.  There were presentations, mandated training classes, and more.  But the two people that signed to me learned by being our friends throughout junior high and high school.  Not one from the elementary school that we were at would still remember the signs.

Granted, there were several others who signed to me in high school that did not attend the reunion.  I was sad to not see them then, and really hope that I would be able to meet them soon.

There are many reasons that they do not sign.  I can only wish they would for me, but I can not just simply demand that they do so.