Teej's Secret Box

In ancient Egyptian times, it was believed that when people die, they would go to the other side, but they would need to take their body and their valuables with them, just so they can keep their elite status going.

That eventually died out, pun intended.

Then it was noticed that if you bury bodies, people around yourself doesn’t die out as quickly, so it became a custom, and eventually involved in a religious ritual.

As I continue to fly over the countryside, I keep seeing those cemeteries.  More often than not, they appears to be empty, devoid of mourning people as everyone seems to be busy trying to make a life for themselves (especially if we are to keep up with the Jones.)

However, there are still people out there who are fiercely devout to the idea of burial instead of cremation or any other means of interning the dead.  It was all due to their upbringing on specific type of faith, and the strong internal belief that things should be done a specific way.

However, the rest of the family is more progressive on this subject, so when my mom passed away, she was cremated.  It is nice that I was able to visit her urn in the comfort of my Dad’s home, just so I can remember her without having to fight the elements.

However, it was generally believed that sharing this information with my Grandfather was not a wise move.  Apparently, he held the belief that cremation is “wrong.”

Nonetheless, my mother was cremated, conservative Catholic background or not.  I am quite sure Granddad knew once he got over to the other side, and met up with Mom.  I doubt he loved her any less for choosing this.

With a yawn, a stretch, and carefully placed scratches done in a deep stupor, I am now ready for some blog posting.  Yes, I have been neglecting my Wii Fit exercises, but I got something better in return.  Yes, I have been neglecting posting on the blog, but I was doing something better.  Yes, my life is one hectic mess especially at work, but I was generously rewarded over the weekend.

As some may know, I met and fell in love with a wonderful woman back in June while visiting Salt Lake City while she was in town for work.  It was a perfect opportunity, I thought — to meet a couple of old classmates from decades in the past and catch up on the news with them.

An old classmate turns out to be something so much more.  We spent so much time talking to each other on ooVoo, using webcams.  Our hands flew, expressing our thoughts in ASL.  We talked politics, weather, sports, computers, and our love for each other.  There would sometimes be a few lulls in the conversations, leaving us to stare at each other, and then the conversation somehow got restarted and went anew.

She enlightens me, and emboldens me.  We understood each other with such great ease, and trust each other with such fullness.  There is such a comfort level I feel, that makes me feel so alive.  A friend noted it the best — “I am so living.”

We both are very rational, trying to be sure we are not doing something wrong, but every time I try to find a new wall to bump into, I keep stumbling across into new boundaries.  I learned so much about myself, and how I love people, because I am exploring new territories with her.

Our relationship is unorthodox.  It is also limited by distance — she lives in Virginia, and I live in Arizona.  So many mile separate us, so much desire pulls us.

How unorthodox is it, you may ask?  Well, it just so happens that she is married.  Not only that, her husband knows and have approved of it.  How can it be?  But do read on, my dear reader.

We finally met again at her place over the Independence Day weekend, and there were such passion, so much release of pent-up demand.

Fortunately for you, my dear readers, it is not all I have done.  I was able to meet with several fantastic friends.  They were quite hilarious, and were quite a wonderful group to hang out with.  We went to the Salem Fair together on its opening day, and had a blast.  We had one friend’s daughter’s birthday party, and a social cookout event the same day, where I got to meet old friends and teachers from days long past.

Enough of that chit-chat, you cries!  What is the story behind my lover and her husband?  Well, we are auditioning for a new movie, “The Thief, The German Cook, His Wife, and Her Lover part 2”.  I am still waiting on Gysen to opt in for playing the role of The Thief….

(Okay, that’s an inside joke that only Jill would understand.  Sorry to the rest of you folks.)

Seriously, Heather and her husband both have a long-standing agreement that they are welcome to be with anyone for a nice fun in the romp as long as they make sure each other knows ahead of time.  It was slightly misunderstood that it really was limited to just a fun romp, and not a “Let’s fall in love with the World” kind of thing.

Somehow, in this whole plot of having a fun romp, Heather and I just hit it off well, too well.  It is not a matter of intimacy we craves (although that is something we both identify with as our main “Five Love Language”), but also the bonding that we somehow achieved over time.  I looked over to Heather at one moment at Salt Lake City, and told her that I trust her.  For those of you who really understand me, this is a major leap of faith.  Hell, I never trusted Jill completely, and she has been my closest friend for years.  In a moment, I now understood why it is possible, and yet why it can seem so cruel to those who fails to win this trust from the ones they lust after.

It is the willingness to involve someone with you in every single aspect of your life (except going to poop, we will pass up on that, thank you very much.)  It is the implicit understanding that we are responsible for each other on many levels, as it is us versus the world.

Or in our case, Peter, Heather, and me versus the world.  But Peter did not quite expect that.  He thought it was still just a fun romp wit long-term.  But when he saw us together, his fears that have been nagging him for years flamed up.  Throughout the week, I knew there were something’s up, and struggled to gain his trust enough to find out what it could be.

Finally, he expressed his thoughts over a course of a couple days, enough for me to wonders what I have been missing.  It turns out that Heather and Peter both have been having some struggles with inertia on their relationship, due to classic signs of misunderstanding due to cultural differences.  Peter is a true German, while Heather and I like to pretend from time to time.  He is hearing, while we are deaf.  Those subtle differences are still enough to ruin perfectly good relationships.

But it did not ruin this one.  As much as I would like to take the credits, it was they who were willing to listen, discuss, and find new ways to rekindle their own relationship.  It is clear they both deeply love each other, but they don’t understand each other perfectly.

First step I took was to make them read “Five Love Languages” – a task they will have to do soon.  Secondly, I took Heather aside, and after relaxing her a bit, started asking her for her side of the issues I have heard from Peter.  It was an enlightening experience, as she admits that she did not want to involve me in this struggle.  I had to point out that love is a journey through the good and the bad – the fantastic experiences, and the deep struggles.  Taking the journey together is the whole point.

The following morning, I got her to be with Peter, and they both came clean – sharing their fears, concerns, and thoughts.  They came down with me to continue the discussion, where it became clear that misunderstandings were pretty much the cause of it all.  It is amazing that when a person desires something to help improve their own life, it can easily be interpreted as the willingness to leave the other person if that person is a roadblock to said improvement.

It is very subtle, and something I am glad to be able to help point out.  The release was clear, and the trust in each one of us grew the more we understood each other.

My relationship with Heather as a lover, and Peter as her husband is growing every day.  We both find the time to chat every moment we could, and I am longing to return to see them, especially Heather (no offense, Peter – I am a ladies man. )

The funny thing about this whole thing – I do not feel as if I must be exclusive to Heather, nor does she wish for me to be so.  If I happens to find wonderful people out there that mutually wants to be together, we could, as long as Heather knows.  Yet with this new relationship, I do not feel in a rush to pick the nearest woman (despite a few obviously wanting a round or two).  After all, Heather has indeed been spoiling me.

I know this will be a shock to people out there, but as I see it now:  I don’t care.  I do care for my lover and her family’s welfare, and will guard it zealously.

I had a great weekend, and I look forward toward many more.

P.S.  Hai Majide!

Wii Fit – Age 34, Time 40 minutes.

Another complaint about the game — when you are off your feet (such as situps, planks, et cetera), it is impossible as a deaf person to know when to start the exercise, and whether you’re doing the exercise right without some kind of a mirror to the screen.  Hearing folks don’t have it much better — they would hear the “up…. down….” for only the first few reps of the set.  Beyond that, you’re on your own unless you fashion some way to see the screen without contorting your head outside where it should be during the exercise.

There is such a huge opening that Nintendo is leaving for anyone to develop a much better Wii Fit using the same balance board here.  Wii Fit is a great start, but if this is the end of what we’ll see in exercise programs, I would be greatly disappointed.

* * *

I would like to take a moment here and bid my dad a wonderful Father’s Day.  He just messaged me on AIM for the first time in a while.  Goooo sis, for training the poor man! 

I am sitting here digesting my dinner, a wonderful series of spaghetti, corn, and salad, along with that awesome wine I mentioned yesterday.  I realized that this place was awfully quiet.  But would that cue me to play the music I have on my laptop — game and anime music for the most part?  No, it’s not gentle enough to appreciate over a delicious meal.  Then I realized that I have the Wii, and the Wii browser installed.  Off I went to this site, where the current version now can play any music you could search for.  Right now, I have the Jazz Radio playing Orange Lady by Miles Davis — a delicious yet mellow jazz music.

Every time I rent a car, I check to see if it comes with Satellite radio, and if so, I pray it is Sirius because they have a better option of jazz music channels.  I have been complimented by valet parkers for my taste in music, but not enough to escape the need to tip them.  Hehe.

* * *

In just 5 more days, it’ll be the “Lakers Vs Celtics and the NBA Playoffs” once again.  Back in December, when the Lakers were shaking off their cobwebs from the whole “Trade Me” Kobe Bryant fiasco, and Bynum was a rising star at the center position, and Boston is on their record turnaround thanks to acquired stars including Kevin Garnett, someone Kobe wanted on his team, I had a prediction – Lakers Vs Celtics.

I thought it was a bit early, since the Lakers team is so young, and the West conference is so strong (so strong that two teams that were not included in the playoffs had a better record than at least five teams in the Eastern Conference.

Then Bynum got a serious knee injury that eventually results in a surgery a couple weeks ago, and prediction of return this fall.  “Damn,” I said, “there goes the season.”  Then miracle of miracles, they got Pau Gasol.  The dream became alive again.

Then Kobe tore a tendon in his shooting pinky finger.  It got so bad they lost to Atlanta the very next game.  He shook it off, opting to not have surgery until after the Olympics.

Then Pau got an ankle injury that kept him out for a few weeks.

All of those challenges kept knocking Lakers off first place, but the last run, beating New Orleans and San Antonio Spurs by wide margins at the end of the season returns and preserved the first place results.

I thought Lakers will have a hell of a time going through the playoffs, while Boston will cruise until Detroit.  The opposite pretty much happen.  Granted, it was not a cruise, especially against Utah, but Lakers had it easy compared to Boston.  But the challenges were surmounted, and we have something we haven’t seen in 21 years.

The chants of “We want Boston” in Los Angeles and “Beat L.A.” in Boston rang true.  It won’t be as hate-filled as the 80s ball, but I expect true competition to shine.  It is difficult to predict the results because we have not faced each other with the same team.  Boston is very good, and Lakers are very good.  There are key mismatches on both sides, but who will take advantage of them?

It’s a shame that Red Auerbach is not around to watch, but then we wouldn’t appreciate the cheerleaders in Boston (after all, he did say that he’ll have cheerleaders over his dead body, and he passed away a week before the first cheerleading team started to dance in Boston.)

Red, enjoy the games — and of course, you still sucks.

* * *

Worked out on Wii Fit – 44 minutes credited, 1 hour real time.  Man, I am sore and tired.  Yes, I worked out this morning, and even now I’m feeling sore in the abs region and the lower legs, along with my neck.  Here’s hoping this week will yield a better result for me in terms of being more fit.

* * *

I was supposed to work today, but ended up spending most of the time exercising, relaxing, and shopping.  What was supposed to be just a Home Depot trip turns out to be a Home Depot, Target, and Costco trip.  My wireless router kept crashing on me, so I got the same router I got my dad, and was duly impressed by.  After an hour of tweaking, it’s as secure as it can be, and feeding all of the electronics in this house precious data, such as the Wii playing Jazz music for me.  Yum!

I also got new light bulbs for the ceiling fan unit in the office, air filters for the house, and this concrete crack filler I plan on trying for the brick wall in the back yard — basically, the top few bricks facing the playground is loose.  I want something that will help reduce my liability by securing those bricks enough for any kids that may decide to climb the fence to retrieve any wayward balls they kicked into my yard (I still have that one ball…) It is amazing how as a kid, you don’t give one wit about what you are doing, and yet as an adult owning a home, you’re freaking out over a loose pair of bricks because someone could find a way to sue you over it.

I still can’t find an ideal spot for the second crystal that dad and sis got me for Christmas.  It is meant to be hung over something to have light shine through, but even the back porch doesn’t have a good spot for it at all.  Perhaps inspiration will strike soon.

The kitchen is somewhat clean, but it can be so much cleaner.  I will have to find some time this week in between my job to do this.

I also got a couple people in Japan to search for this Miracle Fruit tablet.  Here’s hoping they would score a few boxes of that.

Now it’s time for me to enjoy some Netflix movies so I can have it shipped off tomorrow for more goodness.

Well, since I made that missive about me being listless, I decided to make the most of the days I’m home, trying to make up for my past failings, in hope to save this job.

I finally got to clean up my bathroom, after getting a haircut and shaved everything I could shave.  The bathroom and bedroom have not been as clean as it is in months.  I actually dug up old cat hairs which, despite my previous cleanings, were still there.  Jill would be proud of me.

I got the 2nd year for the president $1 coins.  Purty!

I got Wii Fit.  For those who do not know, it’s basically an exercise program along with a balance board.  Very simple in design — there’s four sensors, one for each corner.  However, this design is well done, as it can weight me (190.9 lbs.  Grrr), and detect my motion as I go through the paces.  I plans on using it every day, and will be using it for about a half hour tonight after I finish this.

I am washing 5 loads of clothes, rugs, and sheets.  Wee.  For some reason, my laundry machine is not detecting the lid being closed as easily as it used to.  I hope it does not forecast a new laundry machine or a repairman in the near future.

I went shopping today for food, despite promising myself to do it last night.  Bad me.  I also spent $75 on food, for two reasons:

$27 was toward a really thick cut (think 2 inches) of ribeye that I asked for specifically today, three pounds altogether, making 4 servings.  Oh my god, the Alton Brown method of cooking steak is so much better with thicker steak.  It’s still not the best of cut, too fatty.  What is the Alton Brown method?  Simple:  Bake the steak with a thermostat at 270 until it hit 100 inside.  Pan-fry it with olive oil to preference (1-2 minutes per side).  I like it rare/medium rare, and I use a Jaccard meat tenderizer to break down the meat a bit more.  I dry-rubbed it with garlic, black pepper, and bacon salt seasoning.  Delicious!

$20 was toward Black Box Merlot ‘06 wine.  It is a 3 liter box of a pretty good Merlot.  When I was visiting my family, Dad proudly shared his find, a $2.99 Walmart wine – Oak Leaf Merlot.  It was actually not bad if you consider it as a table wine.  It does the job for beef dishes.  However, this Black Box Merlot claims to be far better due to better selections and processing of grapes.  The founder of this brand noted that Europeans are used to this concept of using boxes instead of bottles for their premium wines to save on costs.  The big advantage for me is to have a wine container that will NOT go bad quickly when I actually open it.  Living by yourself, you have to decide whether to drink the whole bottle within a day, or find a use for the leftover.  For red wines, there’s not much of an option, and it is such a waste when you spend so much for the wine.  With Black Box, I could keep it for up to 4 weeks, which gives me plenty of time to appreciate the wine without getting too drunk.  This one was worthy of a side companion to the ribeye I had tonight.  I definitely will try boxed wines more often now that there are good brands available for a good price.

That was a great dinner.

I also got both of my NAS (Network Access Server) set up properly to allow me to print remotely, and use as a FTP (File Transfer Protocol) to back up my files anywhere.  It was silly — an option that I have long shunned for a while, and forgot about — “Client for Windows Network” was disabled, hence I was not able to locate the printer.  Once it was enabled on my laptop, I am able to print from the kitchen table to my printer in the office.  Woo!

Things to do tomorrow:

• Clean kitchen.
• Take out recycle bin (along with all the recyclable in the kitchen at the moment)
• Play Wii Fit and Wii Sports for 1-2 hours.
• Do a little yard maintenance, and hang one of the crystals in the balcony.
• Work on project for 2-4 hours.
• Go through magazines I got in mail, 1-2 hours.
• Go to Home Depot, and get light bulb replacement for ceiling fan in office, and to see how I can fix the brick wall which has loose bricks at the moment.
• Clean and upload pictures from the trip to Utah.

Things I need to do long term:

• Start a craigslist of my stuff.
• See if I can find a cheaper version of the air filter I’m using.
• Find a landscaper.  Old one moved away due to “lack of business.”
• Shop on Zappo’s for new shoes.
• Find someone in Asia to send me tablets of “Mysterious Fruit” aka “Miracle Fruit” – this stuff actually suppress bitter/sour senses in your tongue, allowing you to taste the natural sweetness of stuff that may be bitter or sour.  Sen Yun seems to sell them.
• Find places that accept donations of larger furniture, in case craigslist don’t sell them off.
• Get a TV for the office in order to hook up my videophone to.  There’s far too many friends who been asking me to get my VP200 set up, so I might as well.

That is all for now.